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We just came home from seeing the movie "LION" taken from the book "A long way home" a true story about a little boy, Saroo, from India who gets separated from his family. Lost in the large metropolis he finds himself on a train for three days all alone bound for nowhere in a country of billions of people. A terrified little boy is rescued from the streets and finds himself in an orphanage where for the moment he is safe.

A social worker takes pity on Saroo and finds him a sea side home in New Zealand; a pristine country surrounded by crystal blue ocean. The loving adopting parents welcome him into their home and treat him as their own special son with all of the perks that professional parents can offer.

Saroo flourishes and matures into a very happy handsome confident young man who feels comfortable in his new home. Mom and dad feel the need to add to their family and adopts another boy from India who turns out to be a very troubled young man who refuses/can not adapt to his new home. Illicit drug use and and emotional turmoil subsequently hurts the family.

Being adopted Saroo constantly searches for the who and where he came from in India wanting to reconnect with his birth mother.

The receiving family believes that they chose the adopted child to share in their lives. The reality is that many young people feel that their original mother/father gave them up: not wanting to raise them as part of their extended family. Searching and wanting to connect can be a life long difficult quest for those who are adopted.

The sages teach us that: "you can take the boy out of the country, but you can't take the country out of the boy." Steve Jobs, President and CEO of Apple was a successful multi billionaire who really never felt at ease with himself. His birth mother decided to have him adopted by a university educated couple. Shortly after he was placed in his new home his adopted parents decided that Steven did not quite fit in. He was rejected once by his birth mother and now those who promised him a home reneged on their promises. The Job family who were not university educated people gave Steve their name: a good home but he always wanted to know why he was not good enough to be loved and cared for by his birth parents.

When you plant carrots you can look forward to seeing long rows of straight fields of healthy vegetables that in time will mature to offer you pleasure and sustenance for your hard work. When you adopt /give birth to children they may not take the time to say thank-you for your hard work.

The stats tell us that it cost hundreds of thousands of dollars to raise a child. If you are most fortunate you may be repaid with love/respect from your children for your life-time of caring.

An OPP police officer stopped his cruiser to inquire of the well-being of a family who were on the shoulder of the Dorchester Road. The father told the officer that; "all was well; they just stopped to have a quick lunch". The officer asked: " if they were having a picnic?" The father replied that : "it was his family but it ain't no picnic."

No one told you that raising children is easy. It takes a lot of patience determination along with a sense of humour to survive your children's childhood. In time the majority graduate from school, move out of the family home, find a spouse and have children of their own. Then you can laugh and remind them that: "what goes around comes around".

Len is a education/career counselor in Dorchester

Len Lesser

Len Lesser posts a report every week

You can email Len at lenlesser@hotmail.com