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THE LEN LESSER REPORT  

THE LEN LESSER REPORT

 

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ARCHIVED BLOGS

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SPRING HAS SPRUNG IN DORCHESTER

It has been a very long winter and Spring has finally arrived at Shalom Acres. Ella has been working every day to clean up the gardens getting the land ready for the arrival of our flowers. The pair of mute swans have been working diligently together to build their very large nest. Spice collects the branches; Sugar makes sure to add the leaves to make it comfortable for her to sit on the nest for six weeks waiting for the signets to hatch.

My job is to bring out and paint our lawn ornaments from their long sleep in the barn. When you are colour blind you can be very creative.

The old couple figurines with Gramma with her knitting and Pops with his Sign Post newspaper in hand are dozing off ; they are supposed to keep their bespectacled eyes on the swans. The large pair of metal birds at the entrance to the pond are there to keep the Blue Herons away from the pond are painted my favourite colours- blue and yellow. The one legged yellow Peacock is strutting his stuff to try and impress the rest of the menagerie that he really belongs.

At the top of the hill there is a birthday present to myself. A very large two hundred pound painted cement replica of the Bandito ,Pancho Villa, with a very large cup in his hand for Tequila. Ella thinks he is a drunk but I maintain that Pancho is just happy to welcome all of our guests with greetings of bienvenido (welcome).

Three pair of yellow humming birds are resting on long metal blue branches and leaves. If you look way up in the sky there is a small flock of metal yellow Canadian Geese that appear to be flying to their summer homes in the North of Canada. Jack and Jill figurines are sitting on a bench hidden in the Day Lilies between a pair of Ash trees.

A women’s clothing store in the mall was closing and they were selling off their full figure six foot tall female mannequins at bargain basement prices. I was smitten with "Miss Daisy". I placed the completely bared naked lady into a grocery shopping cart and covered her the best I could with my coat while exiting the store and then carefully placed her into the back seat of my car.

Perhaps, I scared Daryl a little bit, at the Village Ford, when he gassed up the car with the sight of a nude mannequin lying quietly in the back seat of my car?

I dressed Miss Daisy appropriately in a sun dress/hat/glasses and a pair of high heeled shoes that I found in the basement and quietly placed her on a bench under the Beech Nut tree at the pond not wanting to make a fuss at my great find.

Sarah and Ella, too soon, discovered my secret and were not impressed. They made me return my "inappropriate bare naked lady" to the store the very next day to get a full refund.

Life has returned to normal at Shalom Acres; everything is progressing nicely. The flowers are starting to bloom and the swans are romancing after building their love nest in anticipation of giving birth to a bevy of baby signets. We could not want for more accept, but to tell you the truth: Spice, Pancho and I sure miss the sight of Miss Daisy soaking up the rays of sun at our very own Golden Pond.

Len Lesser is a counselor in Dorchester

Len Lesser

Len Lesser posts a report every week

You can email Len at lenlesser@hotmail.com